Mainly Void Thoughts

How many people do you think have been in a trance state, ever, in their lives? How many do you think understand they have been?

Perhaps, before answering that question, we should look at what a “trance state” really is and how you can identify it.

According to Milton H. Erickson “trance is the state in which learning and openness to change are most likely to occur.” (Quote from: My Voice Will Go With You – The Teaching Tales of Milton H. Erickson).

From the same book: “Trance, in fact, is a natural state experienced by everyone. Our most familiar experience takes place when we daydream, but other trance states can occur when we meditate, pray, or perform exercise – such as jogging, which has sometimes been called ‘meditation in motion’.”

Have you ever been in a meeting or at a lecture (for example) where the topic has been so interesting that you were so focused on the speaker that everything else around you seemed to simply blend into the background, almost disappearing? Have you ever seen a movie or a video where you had that same reaction? Listened to music and the world just vanishes as you drift off into the song? Driving home, getting there safely, but not remembering anything about the drive?

If you’re training Martial Arts, you’ll recognize similar experiences from training with a partner, sparring or if you compete, being in the ring. Eyesight focus on your opponent, while anything surrounding blends into the background, unless it can become a threat (or an aid), which can then bring that piece into your awareness. Sounds fade as well, unless they signal danger or anything else relevant.

If you can enter this state as well during a training class, you’re likely to find that you’re picking up things you never thought of, or even believed possible. In other words, your mind is more open to learning and absorbing new things.

Meditation or self-hypnosis can aid you in more easily enter such a state as well. Not to mention, it’s a great way to relax your head before you go to bed.

I find it very interesting to see people entering this state, during training or elsewhere. The only reason I have put in the context here of training is that I see this happening, both to myself and others, during training. However, it is beneficial to ones training, so it felt appropriate.

Now, have you experienced this during your training, in class, in school, at work? I would be highly surprised if you can honestly answer this question with a “No, never” …

This may be something most will have problems following along with, but it makes perfect sense to me anyway. It’s something I’ve been thinking a lot of recently and received a few lessons in recently. What I’m talking about here is a concept or principle if you may.

With “Letting go” I don’t mean “dropping like a hot plate”. Letting go as a principle has many uses. Most people would think of it in terms of someone close dying and they carry a grief with them, that they eventually need to let go of. This is exactly true, but you can also use the same principle in other areas.

You can let go of:

as a few examples. If you wish, you can split those up into external and internal as well, up to yourself really. First three are internal and the last three are external, of course. Or are they?

As a principle, it is very powerful. All you really have to do is to “let go” of a fear you have? Yes, really. By insistently “hanging on” to it, all you do is feed it. Let it go and feel it shrink and disappear.

Letting go of someone else, well, you hang on they may not like it. If one looks at it from a Martial Arts or fighting perspective, you hang on to someone, they’ll respond by thrashing you more than likely. Same applies if you hang on to someone who wants their own space and their own freedom. Be sure that they will respond by pushing you away. If it is someone you love and cherish, you should step back a bit…

What becomes interesting here is the results of this principle, depending on how you have executed on it. You can harshly let something go, in a fight you may “let someone go” while they get a farewell punch, or you can be gentle and loving while letting go…

You “let go” of someone you love, to allow them space to breathe for themselves, if you have executed well, they’ll return. Such an exercise may even deepen the connection between you. At the same time, if the one you love is no longer going to be there, then “letting go” is of your grief, and ultimately your love, for that person. It all depends on your situation which it is.

On the other hand, in a fight situation, you really do not want them to return, do you? (Unless you really like to hit people I suppose!) Letting go of them harshly then shows them they should probably just stand up, turn around and walk away.

It’s a concept, a principle. It has many uses.

It’s a principle I recently picked up or rather, realised it existed even. By no means have I perfected or even fully understood it. However, it goes hand in hand quite well with space (see previous post) and similar concepts/principles. If you still do not understand what I am talking about here, you can really only realise what I mean by actually trying it. Just remember, every coin has two sides to it. It will become what you make it to be.

Wow, what a roller coaster ride the last few months have been. Never the less, if I look to the future it appears I shall be no less busy and having not much less change in the near term. Lots of things happening, some divulged already, some still to be noted and then some that just don’t belong here (or anywhere public for that matter) …

Looking towards holding a presentation on Hypnotherapy and Hypnosis for a set of therapists, which will be really fun to do. Quite different to what I’ve done before, so will be an interesting challenge.

My Martial Arts training is moving along with seminars coming up as well as progressing along with my own training. Lots of interesting things coming up there too! Always something to improve upon and figure out. Always new things to discover and there’s always one more mind blowing experience to grab on to with both hands.

Getting the house in order also feels really good. Unbelievable how empty it felt those few weeks ago. Now? Not at all! Now I’ve made it mine and I continue to change things here and there, fixing this and fixing that. Feels really good at this stage. Always something to improve there too!

At the moment I’m saving up for a trip back to Sweden. If I can afford it there’s also a wedding coming up in August in Poland which I’d love to attend. (Hey there Mac and Liz!) Would be great to see my family back home right now and experience that hot burning sun back home.

If I can scrape together the money I need, I would most definitely go to Tokyo for a week as well. That would be a real highlight of the year. Not that there hasn’t been a number of highlights already, but that one would be fairly big for me anyway.

I will also be writing and helping to moderate things on a website that is about to launch. Where does all my time go? I keep way too busy, but I do enjoy it. There will be mentions here once things gets closer to the launch of that as well!

There’s more news as well, but hey, those who wait for something good never wait too long!

In other words, keeping going! Upwards and onwards folks!

I’ve not been writing for some time now. Honestly, I’ve kept silly busy over the last couple of weeks. Good kind of busy mind you. Lots of work with the day job, clinic sees clients coming in at a higher rate each week, my martial arts training and trying to find some me time in between it all. It’s an exciting juggling exercise that I find I do enjoy.

I’ve always been a lazy sort of guy, so finding I enjoy this pressure and amount of work surprises me somewhat. Finding I do enjoy fixing things in the house, the way I like to have them, is also a slight surprise. Going through a lot of stuff here at the moment and finding that it is not only easy to do all of this work (not just the house) but I also have found an enjoyment in it all I haven’t had in a very long time.

So, apologies to all, I’ve just been taking time for me recently. Time I well needed and felt I deserved.

I guess the biggest enjoyment has been in keeping going, moving to a brighter future and the smiles it has brought. Three key ingredients.

It has been great finding all the smiles and laughs along the way, the buzz from helping a client, making progress on the projects at work, seeing my fitness level coming up at training, noticing progress with everything, really, that I have focused on recently has been absolutely fantastic.

Now, as to this blog, it will find competition over the next few weeks with another website that is also launching soon. A friend is starting something, what exactly will be revealed soon to those who not already know. I will however make some time to write things here too. It means I’ll have presence on 3 blogs, a couple of forums I will moderate etc. so getting even more busy! All in a good way too and I’m looking forward to it!

Keep going and keep smiling folks!

I’ve been thinking about this recently, as I’ve been seeing more and more things having what I can only describe as a “dual nature”, or “duality”, aspect to them. Something with a “dual nature” in this case is something which is also totally opposites to each other, but without becoming an oxymoron. Let me try to explain the differences here first…

And oxymoron is something where you have to things completely contradicting each other, to the point where they also exclude each other. When I speak of something having “duality” or “dual nature” it also contains these contradicting terms (or so one thinks initially) but they are not excluding each other. In actual fact, they are so far apart and contradicting to each other, they cannot exist without one another. That in itself is an excellent description of this aspect of “duality”.

Let me give you a few examples:

Light cannot exist without darkness, and vice versa! How do you know day light has arrived, if you are not able to see the darkness of the night? Consider someone who was born completely blind for example. Such a person wouldn’t know what daylight is, in itself. Yes, he or she may notice the sun touching on their skin, but what if it is a very cloudy day, the blinds are down, or they are in a room without windows?

Silence cannot exist without sound either, nor can sound exist without silence.

“Good” cannot exist without “evil”. What is good and what is evil?

Peace cannot exist without war.

Life cannot exist without death and death would never exist without life.

A straight road doesn’t just lead forwards, but also backwards. Same as a bend in the road goes both to the right and to the left at the same time. “Whatever goes up, must also come back down.”

So, what use is this duality thing then? Why, where and how can this be useful to understand? Lots of places, situations, thoughts and considerations one encounters in life, is my answer. Very deep, is it? Perhaps, perhaps not. Where it is helping me is when I learn something new. What is said? What is not said?

I find it very interesting when I see people berating each other on the Internet. It’s something that happens not just daily, but constantly, thanks to the “anonymity” and distance people believe they have between themselves and others. They get so tied into this one aspect they are arguing over, they completely miss any valid and possibly important points their “enemy” may present. Instead, I’m trying to add what I’ve recently posted about, while keeping an open mind to what is said, trying to not be judgemental about any statements made. Here is another place where this idea of “duality” may also fit in, as one can use it to be objective and “see the other side of the coin”. For instance, if there’s an argument over something, let people take their own idea, spin it around 180 degrees and have them look at things again. What will show up then? Will a solution to whatever problem being “discussed” suddenly appear? Will it make it easier for each party to take another step towards a good and achievable goal, or will they simply refuse and sit and pout like a 5 year old not getting their candy?

This thing of a “dual nature” can be quite useful, if you try to apply it. Don’t think about it too much, rather just flip things around and see what you find. I can guarantee you, you will be surprised sometimes.

There’s always two points of view, at least. Very much like everything is relative, even relativity as well as something as absolute as time.

Been a while since last I posted! To be honest, I don’t have a specific topic in mind. More that I just wanted to say that I’m feeling great today! Had a fantastic training session last night and now enjoy the usual soreness, which is all good. Being on the mats just makes me feel alive, happy and full of energy.

I have been up to my eye balls with things to do, and something that I really wanted to get through just hasn’t had the opportunity to be raised above the “must do’s” in the last couple of weeks. I’m really looking forward to finally have a few moments (in between everything else) where I can focus on those. I have lots of things I want to do for my clinic that I am trying to plan out and get organised. More training opportunities coming up, lots of things happening at the day job and in general just keeping really busy. Hopefully I can get a couple of hours to spend with my girlfriend too, one of these days!

But, as the headline says, it’s Friday! So today I am throwing out my task list (once I get out of work anyway) and we’ll be going to a good friends 40th birthday this evening. Really looking forward to it, as I’ve been way too busy to keep up with friends for some time now and there will be a number of great people there tonight. Really looking forward to seeing them all again. A lot of them live around the corner from us, so I’ve been feeling bad about not having had a chance to see them for so long. Seriously, they are within walking distance. So, tonight I’ll have a chance to make amends and have a blast.

Task list, screw you. I’m having fun tonight, no matter what you think I should do.

Gavin, Happy Birthday buddy!

One sees so many things during the span of a single day. So many impressions to be had, if one just looks for them. In an every day situation, there is just so many things you can pick up along the way. One can pick up the emotional state of others, just by a glance. One can pick up the sense of joy from a kid smiling as they play around, squealing of happiness. Over the last few days, I have picked up a few other things though.

This week we have spent going down the slopes of Zell am See in the Austrian alps. It has been absolutely fabulous here with lots of sunshine, great food, nice slopes and of course the obligatory hot chocolates with rum.

But the things I’ve picked up on has been a few lessons from the Martial Art I train. It is absolutely amazing how something one learns from fighting can be translated into something like skiing or snowboarding.

In Martial Arts there’s various stances one takes. It is those I’ve mostly picked up on, but other things as well. Looking at an instructor pass with a few students learning how to snow board one can easily pick up several stances as they all learn how to turn. Starting in shizen, slightly bent knees, relaxed. Moving on to hira to enhance stability when starting to move, through ichimonji to start a turn and hoko to again keep stability towards the end of a turn.

Apart from the stances there’s the lessons learned from keeping a smooth flow, keeping going even as the initial fear of falling (and the pain found when landing) creeps up in the back of their heads, taking a bump when one loses control all the way through the happiness when the realization strikes that “hey, I can do this!”…. All the way through trying to capture a feeling, a feeling of flow, smoothness and eventually building up an awareness of what is happening around you (while trying to stay balanced, lest it’ll hurt suddenly) …

Funny that, exactly the same things one is being taught in a Martial Arts dojo, just in a different setting.

For a skier, there’s similar lessons to be found, just different stances. One could think of it as different dances even. Consider the differences, and the similarities between, different kinds of dances. Different steps and movements, but still there’s rhythm and motion as well as knowing where your partner is as well as anyone else on the dance floor.

A skier keeps his focus down hill, a Martial Artist keeps his focus on his opponents eyes. Same thing, just a different object, but both are directed towards where the biggest danger shows itself first. The place where the biggest opportunities can be gotten from, right down “the eye of the tiger”…

Funny that, how such completely different things can hold so many things in common, if one is just looking for them and understanding them. If you look and understand what you see, it will open new doors to you, previously hidden, right on front of your eyes.

Funny that.

If you’ve kept up with me on FarceBook recently, you’ve probably noticed I’ve started my training again. It feels absolutely amazing being back on the mats again.

Sure, I ache everywhere, every day. Still, the more I train the more I am realising I need to train. Not just for getting fit or even for learning a Martial Art. Getting fit is always a good thing. Learning a Martial Art is probably one of the best decisions I’ve taken in life. But there’s so many other things I am learning along the way too.

However, none of them defines this need, this craving for more. Some might even call it ab obsession, though I’m not sure if qualifies. I’d almost call it an addiction. It might actually fit a medical definition of addiction!

How many people do you know that train regularly? Ask those how they feel when they simply can’t get back to their routine and train as normal. More than likely they’ll tell you they feel like they don’t have the energy they used to. They don’t feel good and happy, because they can’t get their fix.

Personally, I get agitated if I can’t train for a while. All those endorphins, that adrenaline pumping through your body. But not just that rush, but also the peaceful state you can find yourself in, right when it is very hectic around you, you can just zone out. Some would describe training hard as the best meditation they’ve ever experienced. In what I train you’ll have a fist flying towards your face, so how can one relax completely and utterly when someone is trying to hit you?

I’m finding out some things I just find utterly amazing, during the most odd times. Thing is, I just love finding those things. I love that rush and I love the calmness, the utter peace, that comes with it.

Damn it, I’ve become a training junkie.

A New Year has passed and people are starting to try and get back into things after a first work week. All these sad faces. But, tell you what, the year has only started. Don’t discount it just yet, just because you don’t like to do what you need to do. I know, I know, staying in bed in the morning is nice, but it sure won’t pay the bills!

Here’s the nice thing about it. It can only get better, right? What’s the point in feeling sad? Why don’t you start something right now? Something you always wanted to do? Or set something in motion, to get to do that thing you always wanted to do? Get yourself something to look forward to at the end of the day. Start planning that trip to Bali. Start saving the money you’ll need for it. Look up that new bike you want to get. What’s the point in being miserable? Life’s to bloody short to be miserable. Ain’t that right, Mr. Grumpy?

And smile.

Whatever you do, smile.

Me? I’ll be back training next week, sod the aching knees. Sure, I’ll take it easy (promise, only one shiner per session, alright?). To me, it’s a really positive thing, looking forward to getting on the mats again. Me knees have been aching for the last several months, haven’t been able to train very much, but I’ve been smiling the whole way through it and I keep looking forward to get back doing it all again. That’s what’s keeping me happy, and I don’t mean that in a way that says “it’s all keeping me happy”, because that isn’t true either. But it is one major thing for me.

I hope you have something like that in your life. Something other than either your work or even your family, that keeps you happy. Something just for you. Let’s face it, we all need something we can call our own. Something we do once in a while, just for ourselves. Something that makes us smile out of pure joy.

So, why not keep smiling for the rest of the year? Might make you remember it as one of the best years you’ve had, and only you can make it that great.

Smile.

The End of 2010 that is. It’s been some year too!

It all started in January. Myself and the missus were going to head off for a vacation in Austria, going skiing. Anticipiation has, as usual, built up and we’re itching to go! Waking up in the morning, thinking, it’s a tad chilly in here, isn’t it? Yep, 14 Celsius when we usually have no less than 18 when we wake up. Hmm, what’s up here? Hop in the clothes and walk downstairs to check if the schedule had been screwed up on the timer or what .. No, schedule is fine. We’ve got gas in the cooker (the house heating is also gas, both getting delivered through the same pipes) so that isn’t the problem. Pop on out on the balcony.. Cold.. Right, it’s -10 Celsius out .. Should have put on something more than a t-shirt! Ah well, now that I’m here anyway … Opening the door to where the boiler is and …. Yup … It has developed a sudden bout of ice-in-the-pipes and burst … Feck!

We have 2 hours left until we have to be at the airport! Luckily we found a plumber who could come out and replace our boiler, but not until the next day! Crap! Ah well, we have his number, so let’s just give him the keys to the house and pray it won’t be emptied when we get back. Thankfully, he was not just an honest fella, he was fine with waiting for payment until we got back too… All €2500 worth …

Our vacation was great though. We had a blast in the slopes and Nush was loving getting on a snowboard.

Once back I was on track to start changing my life. At the time I was working for Amazon, you know “the book people” .. Must say, I enjoyed working there, but at the same time, it was time to move on. I had at this point realized it’s not just Amazon I want to move away from, but it is the IT work as well. I was starting to get miserable to be honest. I had looked around for other things to do with my life and trying to figure out what I’d be happy doing, while it could still pay the bills. Don’t get me wrong, I’ll always enjoy computers and what one can do with them, but I have realized that a hobby that I turned into a career has started to lose its lustre. You know, the very thing that makes it fun and interesting isn’t quite there any longer. Too much work and not enough play I guess is one way to sum it all up.

I’ve always enjoyed talking with people. Just having a chat, seeing how they are, you know? One thing I got to hear a lot in Amazon was that I was talking too much. Hey, it’s who I am. Having a quiet office with nobody to talk to, for me, makes the day very boring, dull and drags it out. So, talking to people was a must for anything I’d take on.

I also realized that I do take a lot of enjoyment out of helping others. I sometimes even go out of my way to help others. Sometimes even way too much out of my way. But, hey, it’s me. I like doing that, so helping others was another must to be in there. But what the heck should I do then? Didn’t really fancy looking at becoming a doctor or anything like that. I’m not one to sit in school and study. I tend to enjoy a quicker pace than most others, so sitting in school has always been way too boring for me. (I did 3 terms worth of maths in 1 term at one stage, because I was bored …)

Alternative medicine however has always seemed interesting to me. So, I started looking at what is happening in that area. You’ve got your Homeopaths, your Acupuncturists, Massage Therapists, Chiropractors and so on .. None of those felt to be something for me … But then .. I stumbled upon something …

Hypnotherapy. But, what the heck is it? You hypnotize someone and then what? Well, I decided I should look closer. It seemed very interesting, lots of different things you could help people with. The whole concept started mesmerizing me. (Funny that!)

So, I went for an introductory course. I was hooked after the first day. Amazing, absolutely amazing. So, I went and took the full course as well and I’m now RC Hyp, Dip Hyp (or in English: Registered and Certified Hypnotherapist, Diploma Hypnotherapist).

In between starting my course and finishing it, I decided I needed to move along with the rest of my life as well and resigned from Amazon. I needed some change of scenery. So I started working for an Investment Bank down in the IFSC (International Financial district in Dublin). Well, not much to say there other than I decided to not continue the whole probation period. SIG and myself went separate ways after 5 months.

Good news there is, more vacation time was had! While I had just quit from Amazon, we decided to go on another ski trip, this time to Arinsal in Andorra. Very nice spot!

Was also over in Sweden over the summer to see my dad and the kids. As always, way too short a stay.

Once I got my Diploma in Hypnotherapy I started looking around to see how I can get my own clinic up and running. Seemingly, this is quite easy here in Ireland. Setting up a clinic that is. It’s getting the clients that’s the crux of the matter. Most clients one would get is through referrals, and how do you get referrals? By treating someone. So, friends and colleagues have been in and the odd client has started popping in. It’s a slow trickle, but it’s getting there.

While the clinic is slowly spinning up I have started working at a company called National Instruments. It’s a really nice company with offices all over the world. Sure, I am still in IT, but I am now working for a company who puts their employees at the forefront. Couldn’t be happier.

First thing they asked as I started was if I could go to the US for two weeks. Of course I can! Excellent! Two weeks in Austin Texas, just as the snow had started coming down over Dublin! -10 Celsius here in Dublin while I enjoyed 24 Celsius in Texas.

I got to meet the team over there, got a much better understanding of the environment, had storage training and squeezed in as many meetings as I could.

Not to mention, I got a chance to train while I was over there as well! Brilliant! So I not only made some new friends at work, I made some new friends outside of work as well.

I’ve learn’t a lot this year. Not just by getting my Diploma, but also about myself, about Martial Arts and so many other things it’s almost scary to sit here and reminisce.

Now, there’s only a few days left of this year. So few one could just count the hours if one wanted. But why sit here and reminisce over what is ending? As with anything else in life, your perceptions will constantly guide you. Instead, look forward to the new beginnings that are about to form. Most people see the New Year as a new start. A way to kick start things. A start for that thing that you really should do. Quit smoking for example. Or perhaps you’re looking to start exercising more? Perhaps a new job is waiting for you? A New Year holds many promises for the future.

But, here’s the kicker … Why don’t you make every day just like that? I found new beginnings several times over the last year. All weren’t good, but some will stay with me for a very long time.

Here’s to new beginnings! Cheers folks!